Wishing on a Star

The school year is almost complete and the joy of summer is spread out before me. This summer is filled with traveling, family fun, cleaning and purging, and getting used to a brand new curriculum at school. As I think of everything I plan on doing, I get slightly overwhelmed. The only thing that relaxes me is to go out in our backyard, swing on our swing and look at the stars.

The stars are calming on a warm summer night. I remember wishing on them when I was younger for prince charming to come along. Now that I am older and have found the man of my dreams, I am wishing on a star for the baby of my dreams. I am keeping hope alive as Bill and I ride this roller coaster of events and emotions. Everytime I get overwhelmed or depressed, I will go to the backyard and swing on the wonderful, comfortable swing my prince charming bought me years ago and wish on a star for the baby of my dreams.

Camping

We went camping this weekend. The great outdoors draw us. The peace and quiet at a campsite, surrounded by trees, deep in the history of the United States in Gettysburg, PA, with a campfire going, smores in the making and our two dogs lying lazily in the grass makes for a wonderful weekend far from the responsibilities of home. Our campsite is a wonderful place, very private, full of families with children, and close to so many different attractions that we never run out of things to do during the day. We talked a lot this weekend about how we would change our camper around for a baby. We are still waiting for our match, but have full faith that we will be picked by an expectant mother when it is the right time. We know that He has a plan for our lives and we trust in Him who made the great outdoors, the peace that comes from enjoying His creation, and we trust in His timing for our addition that we so anxiously await. Please continue to pray for us and God's will on the expansion of our family.

Easter Weekend

Let the cooking, candy shopping and birds chirping begin! Easter weekend is full of wonderful fun. We are going to enjoy the great outdoors tomorrow, cook Easter dinner and get ready to go to my sister-in-law's house on Sunday. Bill's whole family is gathering for Easter dinner, which means the house will be packed with children, laughter and FOOD! This week passed by so quickly, Sunday will be a great way to end Spring Break and get back into the swing of work and reality. I wish everyone a great Easter and pray that you remember the reason behind this holiday. If it wasn't for what our Lord did on that Easter morning, we wouldn't have the hope that we have now. Jesus, Saviour of the world, died for you and me, rose on the third day and is making a place in heaven for all who believe in Him. Have a blessed Easter.

Reunion

I am in charge of the family reunion this year. We are having it near the city where I was born. It is exciting to see family that I haven't seen in a while. My cousins and I have been talking and planning for about a year now. It's strange how the responsibilities fall upon the next generation so quickly, but I am ready for the challenge. I am blessed to have a loving, caring family that wants to get together, wants to travel and have a day of fun, share memories, and bond with each other. We are all very different and have gone our own ways, but we always come back to the fact that we are family and are always there for each other. The older we get, the closer we get. I enjoy sitting up late talking to my cousins on facebook. I cherish the fact that we can be a part of each other's lives, even though we live in six different states. Family is very important, and it's not about bloodlines. It's about truly caring for each other, supporting each other and loving each other. We didn't choose to be family, but we have chosen to be friends.

Rainy Days and Happy Husbands

The Spring rainy season has begun. This is my cue to begin Spring cleaning the house. We are slowly decluttering each room while we clutter the room set aside for our yearly yard sale. It feels good to get rid of things we do not need, even if I know my husband will replace it with new toys. Bill went to an auction this morning and sounded so happy when he called to tell me of his finds. He has been working a lot lately and needed a day of fun to renew. I'm glad he was able to have fun and I'm glad I was able to start spring cleaning. The little things that allow us to renew and take a new perspective on life are so important. When we are able to recharge our batteries and approach life from a happy, positive place, even though obstacles and struggles abound, it helps keep a clear perspective on life. I am going to enjoy the remainder of my weekend getting my head and house in order so we can look toward the future with positive thoughts. May you always look toward that silver lining and remember that He is in control. May you find joy in the simple things and put a smile on your face even when you feel like crying. May you reach out and give others a helping hand instead of feeling sorry for yourself. May Spring be a season of renewal, body, mind and spirit.

Spring Friendships

Spring is my favorite time of year. I love when it begins to get warm, the birds begin to chirp and the flowers peek out for the first time in months. I love going outside and playing with the dogs, going for long car rides and enjoying the fresh air. Spring brings a feeling of newness, renewal, and I am beginning to feel renewed. I have to thank my wonderful friend Shelly for redoing my blog. By the way, do you like the new look? I'm really happy with how it looks and hope to continue to add to it in the future. True friends are hard to come by in today's world, but I am grateful I have some that have dedicated their time to help Bill and I achieve our dream of becoming parents. I hope that Spring leaves you feeling renewed and that you take the time to enjoy your friendships and thank them for all they do.

Favorite Quotes

I am posting some of my favorite quotes today. Please comment with your favorite quotes or Bible verses that help you overcome life's bumpy roads.

"Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true strength."

"If He brings you to it, He will see you through it"

"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is that quiet voice at the end of the day saying, 'I will try again.'"

Networking and Waiting

We had a good support group last night. It was great to see another couple realize their dream. It was great to learn about the entrustment ceremony and see pictures. The agency is trying to help the couples in the program hang onto hope and increase outreach. I have decided I have two options. I can stick my head in the ground and focus on other areas of my life, hoping that good things happen when you least expect it, or I can increase my networking and figure out other ways to get our name and situation out in the public. It may be the snow and the dreariness of winter, but the waiting is really taking its toll on me. Here's hoping the spring brings the news of a great little bundle of joy.

Family, Friends and Babies

In the past few months, I have learned of 10 people who are pregnant or recently had a baby. Today, I found out that a couple in our support group had a successful placement. I am truly happy for everyone who is expecting or recently had an addition to their family. When I told friends that I am happy for these people, people were surprised about my 'gracious attitude'. Do I have a gracious attitude? Yes, I am happy for friends and family members who have their dream of a child. Just because I am happy for them does not mean that I am not sad for me. I try hard to present a positive front, to take everything in stride and not let on that this waiting is eating me up inside. I don't let on that everytime I hear of a pregnancy I have a little crying fit. Everyday I walk through the door I check my messages, hoping for a call. Everyday I'm disappointed. So am I gracious? I suppose, because I am happy for those who are able to have their precious bundle of joy and I have no right to take that happiness away from them. At the same time, please know that despite the happy face I put on the outside, I am crying inside.

Don't Quit- by anonymous

When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill,
When the funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit-
Rest if you must, but don't you quit.

Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As every one of us sometimes learns,
And many a fellow turns about
When he might have won had he stuck it out.
Don't give up though the pace seems slow -
You may succeed with another blow.

Often the goal is nearer than
It seems to a faint and faltering man;
Often the struggler has given up
Whe he might have captured the victor's cup;
And he learned too late when the night came down,
How close he was to the golden crown.

Success is failure turned inside out -
The silver tint in the clouds of doubt,
And you never can tell how close you are,
It might be near when it seems afar;
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit -
It's when things seem worst that you must not quit.

Ideas

Please comment with ideas on how we can make this blog better, how we can spread our outreach and how we can reach our dream. All comments are helpful! Thanks!

Dogs, Parents and Husbands

I spent most of tonight at home with our dogs as my husband went to a class to renew his Master's license. Mom had me tracking Dad's flight from Jacksonville, Florida. She doesn't like it when he travels and was anxious for him to come home. I know how she feels, I don't like it when my husband travels, or when he works late. The only good thing was spending time with Hershey and Sparky. They are quite the pair. They love to lay next to each other and cuddle, unless one is getting attention, then they both vie for attention. I love how they act like children. They love to play with their toys, hate to share and love to chase each other around the house. Watching them brings joy. I can't wait until they have a baby to play with, they love children. In a lot of ways, they are my first children, but we are ready to expand the family and have a child to keep the dogs company! I can see them being like Nana in Peter Pan, watching and guarding our child. Sparky says it's bedtime, so I better go put the dogs to bed. I hope to have sweet dreams of a wonderful future tonight.

Good Day

I had a wonderful day with my first graders today! We had so much fun today, the way learning should be. We learned how to write a summary using sticky notes and then they typed it on the computer. They had so much fun, they want to do it again! I love it when everything comes together like that! Then, we learned about Natural Resources by going outside and finding them on the playground. We wrote them down using clipboards and paper, then we came inside and drew pictures of them. What fun! Days like this make everything else easier to deal with. On another note, we got the adoption report for the past six months and it seems like only two domestic adoptions occurred in that time. I guess the agency isn't getting that many matches, makes our outreach that more important. I'm just glad that I had such a good day with my kids at school, it makes the wait more bearable! I would like to close with a big thank you to my cousins who really cheered me up yesterday. It shows you how important family is and how they can help you through anything with encouragement.

Another Day

Another day has come and gone. I find myself thinking negatively and am trying to combat those feelings. Every year for the past seven years I've gone through this period. The period where I wonder if it ever will happen. Having a baby to love, nuture and raise has been a dream that continues to elude me. I am gathering myself and working toward positive thoughts, trying to find ways to reach out and expand our search so I'm not feeling so helpless. Waiting is hard. Please pray for us.

Hopeful

Bill told me today that he is ready for our child to come home now. He's always been the practical one, the one who said that it will happen when it happens. The one to say waiting is okay, there's no rush. Now, he finally feels what I feel. He finally feels antsy about waiting. He's finally anxious to hold our little one in his arms. So, we sit. We wait. Hopeful, yet guarded. No, we haven't heard anything yet. We are still waiting to be picked. We are still waiting for friends to step forward and lend a helping hand by getting the word out. We are still waiting to bring our precious baby into our lives. We stand, waiting, hopeful for what is to come. Will you stand with us?